Fear

October 12, 2006

In my first office, I kept a quote printed on bright yellow paper tacked up on my bulletin board. 'Do one thing every day that scares you.' It was a philosophy to which I aspired to daily apply myself. And certainly, in that position of having to face large groups of children, teenagers, and academics –often with the goal of convincing them I believed myself to be from 1598 – it was an appropriate thought to have running through my mind. And maybe that was what ultimately prompted me to leave that job I loved and hop the pond with some far fetched notion of staying there…

I still have that piece of paper – in a folder with all the other clippings from my cubicle - out of sight and out of mind, faded into a stockpile of former good ideas. Today it crawls back to the forefront of my intention, tempting me to disregard my comfortable oblivion.

I don't suppose this is exactly an original thought. Often enough we are jolted awake by some element of tragedy… some news that makes us remember tomorrow is not always a better opportunity. Bad news… from which we can either learn or tuck away the opportunity to improve into that stockpile of deflated inspirations.

I haven't decided yet. I like my sense of oblivion. It's easy enough to say life is just too busy right now. Too many stresses… but isn't there something exhilarating in that chance? Some sort of release in the possibility? At the very least, I'll find that folder and put the sign back up to continue to tempt me.